


Focus On Me

by DoomedTimeline



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Abusive Parents, Child Abuse, Dave has PTSD, Emotional Abuse, Karkat is a dick, Physical Abuse, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rose helps him out whenever he has an attack, Will i continue this? probably not, mix of first and third person
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-23
Updated: 2016-04-17
Packaged: 2018-05-28 12:58:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 2,837
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6330178
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DoomedTimeline/pseuds/DoomedTimeline
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bro caused Dave to have PTSD and the horrors of his abuse linger in him</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. ??? ----> Understand that Bro was an asshole

**Author's Note:**

> Bold is Dave's memories (which is also in first person) and non bold is basically a narrator (third person)  
> Please be mindful of this fanfiction, for it has:  
> physical and emotional abuse of children  
> cursing at children  
> teachers who should probably be fired  
> and  
> Violence against children
> 
> also Lil Cal

**“Why cant you do it?” the older asked, smacking me in the head. It hurts but I deserve it, I wasn’t able to shoot the bird out of the sky with the BB gun Bro handed me. I don’t like hurting birds.**

**”I…I like the birds Bro…” I said quietly looking away from him, it didn’t matter he grabbed my chin roughly and forced me to look at him directly**

**“Like the birds do ya? Well watch this shit stain” he pulled the BB gun out of my hands so hard that I almost fell over, he aimed it quickly and shot the bird that had perched not even twenty feet away from us, “That is what you do with birds Dave” he pushed the gun back into my hands hard as he walked back to their Texan apartment. Im pretty sure I heard the door click when he went back inside. Looks like I was going to sleep outside…. Again.**

Its always been like this. Constant bruises and injury, a never ending circle of pain. Its was like that when he was a child, it was like that when he was barely a Teenager. Strifing and fighting a random time’s, whether it be a 2 in the morning or 3 in the afternoon. Teachers never wondered why he always had bruises all over, he was the problem child. They always suspected he had gotten into a fight, some of which said that he deserved them. He always wore aviator sunglasses on his face, a clear violation of school rules but after the first month the teachers gave up, there was no use taking the shades off his face, when they first tried he screamed and covered his eyes, causing a disruption. He was soon taken out of the class, they’ve never tried since. His home life was worse, he never got a moments breath. He must be always on guard, his brother (and ‘guardian’) would never let him rest.

**“David Strider! You take those sunglasses off right now!” the teacher yelled at me, i didn’t even blink at them, I just stared. They were supposed to be threatening? Wow, Bro was worse. “really? Wow, that’s weak” I said nonchalantly, and a ruler came down on the desk in front of me, I flinched, too much like Bro. This teacher was an asshole if you didn’t believe me, they tried to forcefully take my shades, I started screaming. I had too leave.**

**“DAVE!” Bro called. I looked in his direction, something was going to be thrown at me and of course it was, I barely had time to dodge the apple that came flying at my head. Bros been throwing things at me constantly the past couple days, even at night, I had barely gotten even 4 hours of sleep in total the past couple days. Im tired. I want to go to bed.**

He learned from a young age not to trust anyone or anything, the bruises from butts of swords, the unyielding fist that came to his face when he did something wrong, the spring traps sprung into his body when he opened the refrigerator. He didn’t know that anything was wrong, he thought it was all normal. He was a messed up, years of abuse and torture from his older brother.

**I opened the fridge slowly, something was going to happen, I knew it and just as I thought, Lil Cal came flying at me from the freezer. I hate that puppet, hes scary, why did Bro have to do this to me? I just want food.**

It seemed Dave strider would never be okay, until he met people and his life actually became better, his brother had died and Dave cried, whether it was out of sadness or sheer joy that his tormentor was finally dead; he didn’t even know himself, but his tormentor was not truly gone, his memory and actions would appear in Dave’s mind, causing him to fly into a panic and forget that he is a teenager, forget that he’s on the meteor, forget that his is no longer than young eight year old that looked up in fear of his older brother who would beat him and throw him into walls, forget that he is no longer in Texas.

**“Dave calm down, its alright. You’re here now, Bro is gone. There is no need to worry” was she right? Where am i? im scared, I hurt.**

Dave would never be okay, his only solace was his sister Rose, who calmed him down from these attacks on his sanity. She would coax him down and out of the memory, away from the horrors of his past. she knew all too well the experiences Dave went through, she was the first person to think something was wrong and to find out that the other was abused, She was his caretaker, his sister, his solace, his guiding light.

**“Bro does what Dave!?” Roses chat message blinked on my phone, what was this not normal for kids? “Dave that’s not healthy! Its wrong! Are you okay!?” someone…. Actually worried about me….?**

By the time when the scratch happened, and he and Rose were on the meteor, he seemed to be doing alright, the few petty fights he had gotten into with Karkat were nothing, their fights never really meant anything, for once in his life, Dave was doing well and he was happy (the happiest a person could be trapped on a meteor with 5 trolls and your ecto biological sister), but the scars and stitches were still there and, with uncaring hand, could easily reopen.


	2. Karkat ----> Fuck up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Karkat accidentally triggers Daves PTSD

It had been 3 years since Bro died and Dave thought he would finally be alright, the elder Strider no longer able to touch him or hurt him. They were on the meteor now; they were traveling through the dream bubbles after the scratch. They had another year and a half until they met back up with Jade and John. The meanwhile, as they had a lot of time to kill, Dave and Karkat spent their time watching movies and drawing all over Kar’s leader book, drawing dicks everywhere, as they did in typical pale bro fashion. Today, like most days the two were sitting on the couch watching a movie. They were watching princess bride for the thirty millionth time, Dave was barely paying attention though, switching back from looking at his phone and the movie. He hoped the other didn’t notice that much, but when you watch a movie a shit ton of times it starts to get repetitive. Dave didn’t have much choice in the matter of what they were going to watch, Princess bride was one of Karkat’s favorite movies. Dave didn’t necessarily mind; it was just that it got boring after the 5th time watching it. He sighed, Buttercup was being crowned queen in her nightmare, he checked his phone, god he was bored.

”Dave?” Karkat’s voice broke his not focus

“yeah KitKat?”

“are you as bored as I am?”

Woah wait, Karkat was actually bored with the _Princess Bride_!?

“yeah actually” the movie turned off and the dark room got even darker, soon getting a tad brighter as the other turned on a light. Dave yawned and stretched, looking at his phone again, it wasn’t that late. Maybe he and KitKat could have some sort of drawing competition, though they might just end up drawing dicks all over Karkat’s leader book thing like they always did and Karkat would get pissy and storm off somewhere.

Karkat looked at Dave and thought a bit maybe they could watch love actually instead or they could just sit together and read books, something like that. He was a bit shocked at himself that he actually stopped Princess Bride basically in the middle of it, but they had seen it way too much in a single week, why did he keep choosing it- wait was Dave actually wearing his shades all through the movie? Surely he couldn’t see.

“hey Dave”

“yeah?”

“why are wearing your shades, isn’t it dark for you” Karkat wasn’t affected by the darkness, he was nocturnal after all.

“because”

“because why” Karkat walked in front of him, his arms crossed

“just cause” Dave sighed, he didn’t need to tell Karkat. This of course made the others blood boil a bit and went to take the shades off the other, who immediately stood and slapped his hand away.

“dude, no”

“just take them off”

“I said no!” Dave pushed the other away slightly and began to make his way out of the room.

Karkat frowned and got mad as the other pushed him away and began to leave.

“DAVE!” **“DAVE!”**

Dave froze and turned **my** head around slowly, just as **Bro** ran up and pushed **me** into a wall-

**I stared up at the other, my entire body shivering in fear. “B-Bro…. please i-I didn’t do anything …” I was scared, I felt something wet sliding down my face, I didn’t dare reach up and touch it… Bro was glaring down at me, he kicked my side and I fell over holding my side… he was wearing the steel toed boots today… I think I felt my rib crack…**

**“You Shitstain!” he yelled and kicked me again… my entire side was in agony…**

**“Take off the Shades!”** “Take off the Shades!”

**The shades were ripped off my face, followed by another blow… this time to my chest…. Tears and blood dripped down my face.**

**“You mean nothing! Your worthless, stupid, a moron!” he dug his heel into my head and I cried out, holding my head and clawing at his boot and leg. Bro wouldn’t like it and wouldn’t care, he just dug his heel harder into my head. He wasn’t wearing cleats this time but steal toed boots still hurt… alot**

**I screamed out, I wanted it to stop, I hurt, I don’t want this anymore.**

\---

Karkat was confused and scared, he pushed Dave into the wall and fell down, he had taken the shades off in victory but a couple seconds later Dave fell over and started screaming. Karkat took a couple steps back from the Strider, who was curled up in a ball holding his head and screaming for someone to stop something. What was going on? This had never happened before… well Karkat had never thought to make the other take off his shades. Karkat gripped the shades tightly and stared at Dave with his eyes open, something was wrong but he didn’t know what.

Karkat had heard the door nearby open and the sound of heels rushed in quickly, he didn’t look but he knew it was Kanaya and Rose. Why were they here? Rose immediately went to Dave, kneeling in front of him, murmuring a few words and doing something, Karkat couldn’t see what, all he felt was Kanaya taking his arm gently and taking him out of the room…. He had dropped the shades and a faint sound of glass breaking was heard under Dave’s pleas.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I struggled so hard to make this atleast 900 words, jeez well  
> yeah  
> karkat accidentally triggered daves PTSD by pushing him into a wall and then also dropped daves shades, causing them to break


	3. Kanaya ----> Reassure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Its not your fault Karkat, you didnt do it on purpose"

Karkat was being led out of the room and into the hallway by Kanaya, Dave’s screams and pleas were heard in the hallway.

He looked back as Kanaya pulled him away. He was confused, wat was wrong with Dave? Why was he screaming? He lost his chain of thought when Kanaya pulled him into a room and sat him down in a chair. He looked up at the other, still trying to process what happened.

  
“Karkat”

  
“yeah…?"

  
“what were you doing?” Kanaya had kneeled down and took his hands in to hers.

  
“Dave and I were watching movies… and it was dark so I wanted him to take off his shades…”

  
“is that all that happened?”

  
“no…. he stood up and pushed me away and I got mad and pushed him back into a wall…. He fell down and stared out into nowhere… I took his shades off…but he started screaming…” tears were prickling his eyes, Kanaya reached up and thumbed his eyes, wiping the tears away.

  
“Karkat…. It’s not entirely your fault…. Dave isn’t mentally stable…”

  
“what do you mean?”

  
“Dave was abused as a child, it mentally scared him… It’s called PTSD”

  
“…. PTSD….?”

 

“Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder” she looked him dead in the eye, and Karkat realized he royally fucked up, he triggered it didn’t he?

  
“Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder causes people to relive moments of horror in their life, tearing them out of the current time and forcing them to remember”

 

He pushed Dave into a wall…. He pushed Dave into a wall…. HE pushed DAVE into A WALL.

  
Karkat started to cry, he caused his best friend to have a flash back of some childhood horror that he didn’t know about. He felt like a complete asshole, he didn’t mean to, Dave never told him about this. Yeah Karkat could get rough at times but he had never triggered him before.

  
“Karkat Vantas” her voice cuts through the horrible chain of thought that was going through his mind

  
“you in no way had any idea that Dave had PTSD, it is not your fault” she reaches her hand up to his cheek and wipes his tears away with her thumb.

 

“But- “Karkat starts to protest, feeling really shitty

  
“you two were doing the same thing you always did, the only difference was that you tried to take his sunglasses off his face, yes you shouldn’t have done that and it was extremely rude, but you didn’t know, you didn’t do it on purpose” her words are strong and clear, reassuring. “you would never do it on purpose, I know that, you know that, rose knows that and Dave knows that… alright?”

  
“a-alright…”

  
Kanaya pulled the other down onto the floor with her and wrapped her arms around him into a hug.

“Dave will be alright Karkat, you don’t need to worry” she pets his head as Karkat hugs her back, he still feels shitty but Kanaya’s words made him feel somewhat better. He hadn’t even noticed but he couldn’t hear the pleas from Dave, Kanaya had pulled him far enough away and to a room that didn’t have a vent connected to the other room. Maybe she did this on purpose, maybe she didn’t, but either way, he didn’t need to hear Dave screaming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my friend suggested i just post kanaya and rose calming karkat and dave down seperatly, so thats why this chapter is barely 550 words


	4. Rose ----> Be The Light In The Darkness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rose acts as the guiding light

 Rose pulled Dave into her arms, stroking his head as he had his episode. Murmuring small things and trying to keep him from delving further into the state.

“Dave… shhhh Dave… its Rose, it’s okay, you can hear me can’t you?” she said quietly, brushing his hair to the side. Dave mumbled something and curled up tighter, gripping his hair. Rose gently takes his hands and holds them, making sure he doesn’t rip out his hair.

“no…please…bro stop I don’t want it anymore- “

“shhhhh Dave, you’re alright, you’re here now”

He murmurs something and curls up tighter, his entire body shaking as a small sob escapes his lips. Rose look at him and pulled him closer, holding him like a mother might her child.

“Dave, hear my voice, you’re okay, you’re here”

He sucked in a breath and trembled

“Breathe Dave…Breathe…” she rubbed his back slowly, trying to calm him down.

He suddenly went slack and Rose turned his face too look at her, his eyes were half closed and his bright red eyes glazed slightly.

“Dave, are you with me?”

He nods slowly

“where are we?”

“the…..Meteor….”

“What’s is the Date?”

“J-June eleventh… twenty….th-thirteen?”

“good, who am I?”

“Ro-Rose…. My si-sister…”

“mhm… you’re alright Dave, there’s no need to worry” she says quietly, petting his head softly.

Dave nods and goes to push his shades up on his face, only to touch nothing.

“R-Rose?”

“Hold on a moment Dave” she reaches behind her and leans back, grabbing his shades that had been dropped a while earlier, realizing that they had been broken.

“Sorry Dave… Your shades are broken….” She said quietly, showing him the busted shades

He stared at them and took them out of the others hand slowly

“…..it’s okay….I can alchemize a new pair….”

Rose looked at him worried “Do you want me to go do It for you?”

He shook his head, getting up off her slowly “I can do it myself..”

“Are you sure you’re alright now?”

He nods again

“Should I tell Karkat you’re alright?”

Dave freezes, holding his broken shades… “…. Tell Kanaya to tell him… I’m sure she’s with him now…”

Rose nods and pulls out her phone, messaging her partner

“Rose?”

“yes Dave?”

“Thanks….”

“Your welcome Dave- “

He turned toward her

“No…Rose I can’t put to words… how much I’m indebted to you..”

He walks toward her, staring right at her

“Thank you so much… for being there for me… and being my guiding light out of the darkness”

She smiles and cups his face, pulling him down to kiss his forehead

“you’re welcome Dave”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long to come out, i got a virus on my laptop and had to reset it. i lost everything for the two storys im working on, this one and That which happens in the rain. i even lost the chapter plans so..  
> sorry
> 
> OH AND THIS IS THE PAGE THAT HAPPENS TO FALL ON 6/11/13 well a day after it  
> http://www.mspaintadventures.com/ACT6ACT6.php?s=6&p=008143

**Author's Note:**

> this is really more of the prolog more than anything?  
> i plan on getting around 1000 words per chapter and so far i have about seven chapters planned so far, but it will not end at seven chapters, not by a longshot probably.


End file.
